For many years I held the “picture” of you close to my heart. A picture of long ago. I cherished in my heart the memories of long ago. I twirled my baton in the “Grey Cup Parade” while your marched behind me playing your trumpet. “The last song”

Years later here I stand at your bedside trying to come to terms with our “Final Good bye” I search for words, for memories, for the times “special” to both.A time to cherish the moments we both shared. There was little joy to share at such a time, nothing but memories of the painful past.

I longed for you to walk me through life, to my future, a life where I was would be “cared for” with gentle gloves, a kind heart. I held my hand out to you but walked alone.

I prayed every night ” please Lord bring my father home”.. My prayers were answered today 40 plus years later, where I hold your hand and walk you “Home” you are not alone.

A frail man before me with tears in his eyes unable to speak the words I so long to hear. One of two most startling moments for me was to learn your eyes where Blue ! The other moment: You were struggling to breath, curled in a fetal position as I held your hand. A tear streaming down my cheek as I talked of Gimili Manitoba. One of the most happiest moments of your life. When all of a sudden you sat up straight as a soldier and asked “why are you crying” and wiped the tear from my cheek. You then returned to a fetal position. I have never witnessed any thing like this before. It was as though my Heavenly father was speaking to me through my earthly father.

Surrounded by family I have not seen in many years I noticed how difficult it was for you dad to say what you really wanted to say. I was waiting to hear words that never would come. But deep down in my heart I know you cared and loved me in your own way. Guess that is all that really matters.

It is difficult to love a man you hardly knew other than in name only, saying goodbye even harder. I will hold on to the memory of you and I in the grey cup parade where you will continue to walk behind me now you are gone.

Even in name only you were my dad and I miss you